Just once in my life, I've wanted to sit at the head of a giant table, covered in the blood of my enemies while I devour a huge leg of meat from what I can only assume came from a Dinosaur. You know the scene setup I'm talking about. It's in nearly every Renaissance-inspired film, and it's on my bucket list. Well, since time machines don't exist, I'll settle for the next best thing. The Montana Renaissance Faire. Here are my top 5 things I suggest you don't miss if you are to attend this badassery.

Music:

As with everything at the festival, the tunes will be themed. This year the Drunk and Disorderly duo will be back to strum and sing for you while you dance and imbibe on some local ale.

The Third Eye Archers

This Sandpoint, Idaho horse archery group is sure to blow your mind while showcasing skills and acrobatics that would have been used on the battlefield.

Magic

This year's festival will feature Connor O'Cairrag, the "world's tallest leprechaun magician," showcasing comedy, wit, and sleight of hand magic.

Knight Battles

The Salt Lake City Crusaders will be draped head to toe in authentic armor and weapons to fight in real battles and real consequences. YES!

Food and Vendors

I'm secretly a fat kid at heart, and as I said at the beginning, I'm all over this: giant piles of meat and authentic adult beverages. The Faire will have plenty of vendors selling their wares and food. Make sure to take a break from the festivities to fill your gullet and goblet.

Here are the details so you and your band of merry friends can enjoy this rad event.

Date: July 30th-31st and August 6th-7th (10am-6pm)

Location: The Majestic Valley Arena in Kalispell, 3630 U.S Hwy 93

Camping passes and RV hookups are available at extra cost. Ticket purchases will cost you $15 for kids and $25 for adults and can be purchased HERE.

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